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She wasn’t perfect. She had two different colored eyes, which is definitely a flaw and not a magnetic, compelling, unusual form of beauty.

“It makes you so special,” he told her. She shook her head.

“Bad special,” she said.

“Good special,” he said. She didn’t know what to believe.

“I don’t know what to believe,” she told him. “You think the thing I think is bad thing is good thing.”

“That’s good thing,” he said.

"

Flaws Only A Protagonist Could Have, Mallory Ortberg at The Toast

CLICK THROUGH AND READ THEM ALL

(via froth)



posted 49 minutes ago with 2,834 notesviasource. • reblog



I realize that trying to talk to a customer service rep at the power company during a power outage is not the best idea but I am dumb and paid the bill even though my roommate already did




lesbianwarriors:

This is either a gay wedding or a straight one with a selfish groom



posted 9 hours ago with 72,580 notesviasource. • reblog



drunktrophywife:

ICONIC



posted 9 hours ago with 207,820 notesviasource. • reblog



osamah:

vaporheart-archive:

Oh these pies aren’t homemade, they were made in a factory.

A bomb factory.

They’re bombs.

who the fuck thought up the plot for this episode



posted 9 hours ago with 375,198 notesvia • • reblog



broccoliavenger:

meulins-choice-ass:

87daysbefore:

me: 

image

you:

image

Lemon is someone out  theres favorite.

thats the most uplifting thing ive read all day









posted 19 hours ago with 1,521 notesviasource. • reblog

# UM # ezra


Baby’s first words :)

memeking69:

baby: y…y..
mom: yeah?
baby: Yo Danny Fenton he was just 14 when his parents built a very
strange machine
It was designed to view a world unseen
(he’s gonna catch em all cuz he’s danny phantom )
When it didnt quite work his
folks they just quit then Danny took a look inside of it
there was a great big flash
every thing just changed
his molecules got all rearranged
(phantom phantom)



posted 19 hours ago with 13,523 notesviasource. • reblog





posted 19 hours ago with 1,852 notesviasource. • reblog